Copyright 2006 Telegraph Group Limited
All Rights Reserved
The Daily Telegraph (LONDON)

August 1, 2006 Tuesday

SECTION: FEATURES; Spy; Pg. 19

LENGTH: 603 words

HEADLINE: Spy

BYLINE: Celia Walden

BODY:


ROYAL FLUSH

With pictures of our arid new British landscape filling the news pages, there is no doubt that the drought of summer 2006 will be remembered for years to come. Empty rivers, failing crops, cracked reservoir beds and water shortages for livestock have made dirty cars and wilting plants seem insignificant.

And the Queen is keen to do her bit to help: I hear Her Majesty has had Interflush cisterns - pounds 20 lavatory devices that control the amount of water being flushed - fitted at Windsor Castle.

"We have had more orders from Windsor Castle, for which four were bought back in March,'' says ex-cabbie David Wilks, the creative force behind the appliance.

"A while ago, Prince Philip, who is known to be blunt with his words, said someone ought to come up with a device to save on the nine litres it takes every time you want a pee. I don't know if they have been told to fit them, or if it's an employee who took the initiative.''

If it weren't for the certainty of some indelicate response, someone could ask Philip.

EXPOSURE

Proof that a fleeting mention in Spy can make you into an international star - well, almost. Last week, I reported that Nicholas Bennett, a Tory councillor in Bromley, was launching a crusade to stop men taking off their T-shirts and wandering around stripped to the waist. And it has prompted a flurry of calls from journalists around the world, wanting to highlight his campaign.

"The phone didn't stop ringing for three days. First, I was on Irish radio and Canadian television, then I found myself being interviewed for ABC's Good Morning America programme and CNN,'' he tells me.

And it didn't end there.

"When I left the civic centre on Tuesday, I was told that a busty model sent by the Sunday Sport had been hanging around most of the afternoon hoping to see me. According to the staff, she was very attractive, but I'm afraid she had gone by the time I emerged from my meetings.''

think again

Margaret Thatcher once declared: "Nothing is more obstinate than a fashionable consensus.''

She would no doubt take comfort in the fact that there will never be a meeting of ultra-trendy minds in the world of think tanks.

Proof of that arrived on my desk in the form of a press release from the Libertarian Alliance headlined: "Rise in truancy to be welcomed''.

Commenting on a study by PricewaterhouseCoopers showing a rise in school truancy rates, LA director Sean Gabb doesn't mince his words.

"State schooling is an instrument of ruling class control and a means by which ideologies of obedience are imposed on the young,'' he claims.

"Rising truancy levels are to be welcomed. They show that increasing numbers of the young are withdrawing from the process of mass brainwashing.''

hot pursuit

Caprice (right) has had her fair share of toy boys in her "33'' years.

But Prince William's dashing polo-playing pal Jacobi Anstruther-Gough-Calthorpe - for whom, I imagine, form-filling must be a chore - failed to join that illustrious list on Sunday afternoon, despite persistently pursuing the glamour queen at the Cartier Polo Event at Great Windsor Park. "Despite being accompanied to the event by a girlfriend, Jacobi couldn't keep his eyes off Caprice,'' reports my source at the Audi-sponsored event.

"When they moved on to the Chinawhite tent and his lady friend was out of sight, he led Caprice on to the dance floor and made what amounted to bumbling advances towards her.

"Jacobi was clearly trying to impress her with his moves in a secluded corner, but she successfully kept him at bay.

"Unfortunately for him, Caprice was only interested in her current beau - Rick Parfitt Junior.''